Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Dream Interpretation Time!

All last weekend I kept having these dreams where things would start to go my way then inexplicably go sour. Inevitably, I would wake up in the middle of the night feeling restless. One dream in particular stuck with me because I was in the middle of it when the alarm went off. Okay, amateur--or professional--dream interpreters, see if you can help me figure out what my subconscious is all about.

Ryan comes home excited about this great deal he's seen on a new house. (And this is partially how you know this is a dream because Ryan does not want to move. And neither do I) I reluctantly agree to go with him to check out this gem of a house on the other side of Kennesaw. We wind through town to the countryside (further proof this is a dream) to find a cute little ranch on a ton of acreage. We park in the looped driveway and enter the open house.

Okay, so there's a bathtub in the living room. Yes, a bathtub. Then the kitchen is tiny, but that's because there are two of them, almost identical galleys with the oven opening into the same space the refrigerator would open into. At the point the agent points out that the house belonged to twins so there had to be two of everything. I look at her like she has lost her mind.

As I walk through the house it becomes exponentially larger, kinda like the fourth Harry Potter where they walk into the tent and there's all that space. I start seeing possibilities and thinking that it's a real steal for $130,000. I keep thinking we could flip this place and make a ton of cash, and in the meantime, the kids would be able to have a playroom. I'm walking through and count at least 6 huge bedrooms, all with king-sized beds. No space is wasted--one of the bedrooms is up at the top of the stairs underneath the eave of the house with a bathroom on one side and a twin bed on the other. Remember this tiny space with the toilet at the top of the stairs because we'll come back to it later.

I'm practically sold on the place and already thinking of knocking down the wall between the twin kitchens to make one larger one and, of course, taking the tub out of the living room when the agent takes me down to the basement. It's huge! And finished! And they're installing hardwood floors in the three massive ballrooms down there. Then she takes me through the secret passage (too much Clue?) to the optometrist's office at the bottom of the cliff. Apparently, one of the twins had married an optometrist, and he preferred to walk through the earth's core to get to work. I don't know.

So, I'm getting totally enthusiastic about the house. I don't know where Ryan is. I think he must have dropped me off. Then I go back upstairs and step out on the back porch, which is huge with columns and overlooks the ocean. I'm sold at that point, and I'm going to get that house no matter what. Because, hey, let's fact it: there aren't that many ocean view homes in landlocked Kennesaw, GA. I turn to the agent and say, we'll take it.

And that's when things start falling apart.

First, a cop comes in to give me a parking ticket. For parking in what will soon be my own driveway. I argue with him until he sees how inane the whole thing is, and he goes away.

Then, once the house is mine (because the closing process in dreams is apparently light years quicker than in real life) the son of the former owner busts in with a gun wanting money. I someone console and cajole him out of actually robbing us but tell him he can have the proceeds of our next rummage sale, including what he would make from selling the extra tub. (Apparently, I really wanted to get that tub out of the living room)

Then I'm walking outside, taking in the sea breeze when the ocean starts encroaching on my beautiful neoclassical portico. Even though the house was originally on a cliff. The water is coming and sharks with arrows poking in their backs start circling over to the side even as water laps across the porch. I run for the house, but I had accidentally left the windows open, and the sharks come in with the water. Then I run upstairs for the tiny bedroom/bathroom thinking the sharks can't climb the stairs. And so sharks can't, but wolves can, and the sharks are turning into wolves. Blessedly the pink decor behind the toilet has suddenly become a wall of a hundred different guns. I take one down and start shooting, but I run out of bullets as the last wolf approaches, and he morphs into a man, a man who looks an awful lot like The Comedian, from the Watchmen graphic novel. He's coming for me. But I'm out of bullets. I'm backed into the toilet with the fuzzy cover.....

And the alarm goes off.

Someone please explain this to me. This can't possibly be a normal dream. This one is almost as bad as the Heavenly Hash dream from back in the day.


  1. Even in your dreams, you're detailed! I think I must message you--I have a couple of ideas.

  2. lol. If you were my husband you wouldn't worry about this dream you'd turn to me and say "I had the best dream ever." But you're not so I would say it's your mind processing a lot of info. [I think :)]

  3. Weird, right? Where does my mind come up with this stuff? And as much as I remembered, there were other details that I've forgotten. Lots and lots of beds in this house. Very weird.

  4. I have something! Take a look at these blurbs from

    "To see a new house in your dream, indicates that you are entering into a new phase or new area in your life. You are becoming more emotionally mature. If you are locked out of the house, then it represents rejection and insecurity. You feel you are being left behind. "

    "To dream that water is rising up in your house, suggests that you are becoming overwhelmed by your emotions."

    "To dream of making home improvements or working on home improvement projects, refers to improvements that you need to make on yourself. Consider the type of improvement made in the dream for additional analysis. If you are adding onto your home, then it suggests that you need to expand your way of thinking. You need a wider perspective on things. If you are re-roofing in your dream, then it suggests that you need to raise your goals. You need to set your sights higher."

    Dude. This isn't good:

    "To see a shark in your dream, indicates feelings of anger, hostility, and fierceness. You are undergoing a long and difficult emotional period and may be an emotional threat to yourself or to others. Perhaps, you are struggling with your individuality and independence, especially in some aspect of your relationship. Alternatively, a shark represents a person in your life who is greedy and unscrupulous. This person goes after what he or she wants with no regards to the well-being and sensitivity of others. The shark may also be an aspect of your own personality with these qualities. "

    "o see a wolf in your dream, symbolizes survival, beauty, solitude, mystery, self-confidence and pride. You are able to keep your composure in a variety of social circumstances and blend into any situation with ease and grace. You are also a loner by choice. Negatively, the wolf represents hostility, aggression, or sneakiness. It may reflect an uncontrollable situation or an all-consuming force in your life. This could point to an obsession, an addiction or something that is beyond your control."

    And finally:

    "To see an ocean in your dream, represents the state of your emotions and feelings. It is indicative of spiritual refreshment, tranquility and renewal. Alternatively, the dream means that you are feeling empowered and unhindered. You have a positive outlook in life and are not limited by anything. If you are sailing across the ocean, then it signifies new found freedom and independence. You are showing great courage. If the ocean is rough, then the dream represents some emotional turmoil. You are doing your best to handle life's ups and downs."

  5. Wow! I think this might be residual of all that you've done the past couple of years. I know for a fact that you've been quite busy with all you have on your plate (I think we might be those twins.... Wonder what the twin thing was about...).

    Anyway, with all that you've found in regards to meanings, maybe you should look at next year's schedule and see if you are projecting you feelings about it. Just a thought.

    LOL! Don't take my opinions, though. I dream about peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. What does that say about me?


    Good luck in figuring it out.


  6. I think it means you need to lay off the black bean soup & eat a donut.
    A chocolate donut.
    Because creamfilled chocolate donuts make policemen happy & don't make you back into toilets with fuzzy covers.
    Think about it.

  7. Tami, the twin thing intrigued me, too. I filed that away to gestate since a short story about twins how have to have one of each seems like an interesting short story idea.

    Pamela, you made me laugh out loud. Maybe I will get that donut...once I've made my writing goal for tomorrow!